this week has just been one of “those weeks.”
you know the ones I mean, right? the one where everything seems to be a mess. and when it can’t get messier, it some how does? yup. one of those.
if i had to pick a theme for this week, it would be “epic failure.” my mistakes this week for some reason have not seemed like “little” ones, rather “heroic” mistakes. ha. :)
tuesday night I came home from work to make homemade spagetti sauce with tomatoes from the garden. lo and behold, the tomatoes had simmered for too long and were hopelessly beyond hope. after trying for 2 hours or so to doctor it up, we ended up dumping it out and saving the veggies to use with some new tomatoes.
thanks Sarah, for once again, faithfully pointing me to the cross… pointing me to to the humor and hope found in that silly situation and for making me smile as you shared your story of the chocolate cake that catapulted off the counter. :D
its been a good week at work, just long. we are running out the production of a vehicle at the manufacturing plant where I work and I am in charge of all the planning details for the runout. Needless to say, there’s lots to remember. lots of details to coordinate and lots of miscellaneous things that can fall through the cracks. There was a major computer error today, and, I had no clue how to fix it. I spent about 3 hours trying and thing just kept getting worse. Praise God for a helpful IT support guy in Germany that was willing to stay at work late to fix the issue and reset the program!
Despite my feelings, despite my failures and despite my countless sins, my God has proven Himself faithful to me yet again through these past few days. there seems to be nothing to cling to this week as I look around and see all my fruit in ruins on the ground, but the Master Gardener seems to still be lovingly (albeit painfully) tending the branches still. He has surrounded me with people who have patiently loved me in spite of my sins, people who have loved me as necessary and corrected me as necessary. Praise God for both, as they are both a valuable asset to our Christian walk (and praise God for friends He’s given me that are “friend” enough to do both!!)!
He has given me department managers that despite my lack of experience in my new job, are thankful for me and make an effort to mention that (on almost a daily basis). Wow. I don’t want to forget the gift that is. I’m very aware their thankfulness is not a result of my “great” ability to do my job (because I mess up daily) but rather is a gift from God – an instrument used by my Savior to encourage and bless me. I’m thankful for my health. I was able to go to the gym last night for the first time in a few weeks (just finished the body detox program that I was on for the last few weeks).
I can see God working. I know He will continue. He is faithful. He will not forsake. I can trust in that. When I look around and as a result of my “tree,” I see fruit that keeps falling off and lying on the ground in what seems to be a useless way, I can still thank my God for the fruit that He produces in my life. That fruit, even the fruit that in my mind is not as “perfect” as it should be, can still bring glory to Him. I long for my life to bring Him glory, whether that is a life of successes or a life of epic failures. Now, don’t get me wrong, I would much rather have a life of successes.
But I long for the song we sang last Friday in care group to be the cry of my heart: “shall I take from your hand the blessings, yet not welcome any pain? shall I thank you for days of sunshine, yet grumble in days of rain? you are good when I’m poor and needy. you are true when I’m parched and dry. You still reign in the deepest valley. You’re still God in the darkest night. Oh, let your will be done in me. In your love I will abide. oh, I long for nothing else as long as you are glorified.”