joy in Your presence

In your presence, Lord, there is joy.
Am I far from your presence?
Am I missing your glory when I focus on my pain?
I am weak.  You are great.
Have I forgotten what is truly important?
Why do I not feel the joy that once proved so precious to me?

If you can be glorified through my weakness, will I be content with it?
If you become bigger though my pain, will I give you thanks?
Can I live in gratitude despite exhaustion? Or frustration? Or confusion?
When it’s a sacrifice, will I still choose to praise You?

How long, Lord can I go on like this waiting for your voice?
Help me to listen. Help me to see it.
Help me not to focus on a conclusion as my answer, help me to focus on You.

For You are my answer.  You are my hope.
In Your presence I find my joy.
You drew me out of my pit.  If you’ve done that, why do I doubt?
Why does my heart cry out in anguish and fear?

You’ve proven your faithfulness time and again
Why is my soul downcast yet again?
I look to You. My feet are on You, my Rock.
My ways are secure.  Though hidden in darkness for now.

I will rest.  I will hope.  I will have joy.

Devotional Christian

I mentioned last week that I began writing for a devotional blog.  The posts can be found at Devotional Christian. 

The site has many great resources and I’d encourage you to check it out.  There are links to many great online devotionals such as Spurgeon’s Daily Meditations,  the Valley of Vision, Our Daily Bread, and more

Also you can read original posts by various authors, including myself.

I pray that God uses these posts to encourage many and to point us all to the hope we have in Christ

where i’ve been…

sorry the blog has been so quiet lately.  my life seems to have chaged quite drastically over the past few weeks.  and the changes have been good and very exciting and faith building and tiring all at the same time.

about a month ago, God answered a very specific prayer of mine… a prayer that I have prayed for years.  I’ve prayed that I would meet a man who might one day become my husband… a man who loves God and cherishes that relationship above all else, a man who will love and care for me with patience and tenderness, a man who will lead and guide me humbly as he follows Christ.  Well on August 28th, God answered that prayer.  Now, I have NO clue at all where this will end… but we are both praying for and pursuing the possiblity of marriage.  God knows the end… we are currently in the process of taking the steps He’s called us to for now and trusting Him to make clear the end result of this path. 

In so many ways, Ted is far beyond what I’ve asked for in a man.  I am one very lucky girl to have his affection and care.  And yet somehow, he feels the same way about me… that he’s the lucky one.  Yet like I said, God knows the end result… but either way… even if for some unforseen reason, God takes Ted just as quickly as He brought him into my life, (oh I sure do hope and pray that’s not the case),  I have grown in my faith and trust in God through this process. 

Well, that, i’m sure as you can imagine, has taken a good bit of time lately.  We’ve spent a LOT of time together just getting to know each other… asking questions, laughing, talking, praying, etc.  I’ve enjoyed every moment.  Which has resulted in a lack of discipline when it comes to posting on the blog regularly.  I apologize for that. 

Another thing that has come up is my health.  The last 2 months or so have been some of the best physically I can remember.  I’ve started working out with a personal trainer to increase my strength and to help my body be able to fight illness better.  We’re monitoring what I’m eating and so far have lost 17 lbs!  I’m grateful to God for the ability to be able to do this.

Also, something else that has been on my heart lately is writing…  which is kind of funny considering that I’ve written significantly less in the past few weeks.  Well, an opportunity has come up for me to possibly do some devotional writings for a website online.  I’m very excited about the opportunity and am humbled to think that God might use me in this way.  I should know something within the next week or so… 

i seem to be in a season which is new for me… my cup overflows.  Now, I know God’s goodness and mercy always are with me and that no matter the circumstances, that spiritually my cup always overflows.  But right now, physically and practically, I seem to be in a season where things are better than I could have imagined. 

I would appreciate prayer that God would help me realize that even now, even when things are “good” that I am just as helpless and needy for grace as I am on a day when I can barely get out of bed without pain.  I will try to be more consistent with my blog posts as well …  :)