So many questions


My mind’s been thinking lately.  God’s been working in new and exciting ways.  He’s been doing different things and leading me in ways I’ve never gone before.  Its all been teaching me more of who He is and its all been deeply personal.  I’m learning more of how personal my God is, not merely how big He is.  He is becoming sweeter and dearer to me as each step is taken.  This relationship is now revealing new and greater depths, depths of which I never could have imagined 5 years ago when He first called me to His side.  


And when I passed by you and saw you wallowing in your blood, I said to you in your blood, ‘Live!’ (Ezekiel 16:6)


This was what happened that day to me.  I was cast out to die.  He passed by me.  He could have literally passed me by.  Yet He saw me, had pity on me in my helpless state and spoke life into my lifeless body.  


But since that day, He’s become much more than a Savior.  He’s become the Object of my trust.  He’s become my Father.  Its become intimate.  It’s become deeply personal.


“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ!  According to his great mercy, He has caused us to be born again to a living hope, through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled and unfading, kept in heaven for you, who by God’s power are being guarded through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time… Though you have not seen him, you love Him.”(1st Peter 1: 3-5,8)


Because of who He is, I trust.  Because of the confidence I have in Him… the confidence that He will complete what He began in me… the hope of the inheritance He is guarding for me, I confidently trust Him, right now, in the midst of seemingly millions of unanswered questions.


“And I will lead the blind in a way that they do not know, in paths that they have not known I will guide them. I will turn the darkness before them into light, the rough places into level ground.  These are the things I do, and I do not forsake them.” (Is. 42:16)


I know this God I believe in.  I know what He’s done for me.  But greater still, I know what He’s done in the past.  I know I can trust Him because He has proven Himself faithful time and time again.  When I’m tempted to doubt because my situations seem to be overwhelming, I look back.  I look back to the cross where He fully paid the penalty I deserved.  Then I look back even further… I look back to history, where He proved time and time again that He can be trusted…


The God who led the children of Israel from their wilderness, the God who protected Noah and his family from the flood, the God who led Abraham, when even he himself did not know where he was going, the God who protected Job when everything earthly was taken away, the God who was with John even through exile, the God who was with Peter, even through multiple failures and denials, the God who was patient with the Corinthian church, the God who redeemed Hosea’s unfaithful bride, the God who heard Hannah’s prayer, the God who chose the most simple handmaiden, Mary, to be the mother of Jesus, the God who created the universe with a word, the God who cried when His friend Lazarus died, the God who wasn’t too busy to heal to woman who had bled for so many years, the God who cared for the children and the outcast, the God who listened when David and Jesus cried “My God why have you forsaken me?”, the God who did not forsake Joseph in that prison, the God who allowed the fleece to be dry, the God who granted Ninevah repentance, the God who planned the entire redemptive history of mankind even before the creation of time… this is MY God!!!!


And that God is the One who says “I will lead you.”  


“But now thus says the Lord, He who created you, O Jacob, He who formed you, O Israel; “Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine.  When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through the fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you.  For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.  I give Egypt as your ransom, Cush and Seba in exchange for you.  Because you are precious in my eyes, and honored and I love you, I give men in return for you, peoples in exchange for your life.  Fear not, for I am with you; I will bring your offspring from the east, and from the west I will gather you.”  (Isaiah 43:1-5)


“In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith – more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire – may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.”  (1st Peter 1: 6-7)


“I had heard of you by the hearing of the ear, by now my eye sees you.” (Job 42:5)


“Many are the afflictions of the righteous but the Lord delivers him out of them all.  Oh taste and see that the Lord is good.  Blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him.  I sought the Lord and He answered me and delivered me from all my fears.”  (Psalm 34: 19, 8, 4)


For years, I’ve been the type of person that instictively wants to “fix it.”  It doesn’t matter what “it” is, I want to fix it.  God’s been teaching me lately that He’s the one to fix “it” not me.  He’s the One full of power and might and strength and wisdom.  He is the One who never slumbers nor sleeps.  He is the One with all authority and rule and reign.  My job is to trust.  To depend.  And to humbly obey, trust, follow, submit and rejoice. 


“For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence, for my hope is from him.  He only is my rock and my salvation, my fortress; I shall not be shaken.  On God rests my salvation and my glory; my mighty rock my refuge is God.  Trust in Him at all times O people; pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us.  Selah.”  (Psalm 62: 5-8)


One response »

  1. What an awesome example of learning in progress. Often we have to re-walk these paths, sometimes even in the same areas (issues) we’ve trod before.

    Thank you for being humble enough to share your experience with us.

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