…i sure do…
sometimes it looks like “God, why do I hurt? why do you not give me answers? why are you withholding answers if you know everything? Have you forgotten me? Do you care? Why do I keep serving you if you are silent? Why shouldn’t I just quit when it seems you’ve quit on me.”
then other days I ask God, why would you put up with me? why would you forgive me yet again? why are you so patient with me? why can’t I change? why do I keep forgetting you?
and then other days I ask God, why? Why would you send your Son to die for me? Why would you save me from hell? Why are you so gracious to me? why would you choose to show me such amazing mercy?
what’s the difference? Has God changed? How can I go so drastically from “why have you forgotten me” to “why are you so gracious”? All 3 rounds of questions seem to stem from being overwhelmed with something. In the first case, I am typically overwhelmed by my pain… or overwhelmed by whatever situation I’m in. The second round for me seems to be that I’m overwhelmed by my sin. And in the third round, I’m overwhelmed by God.
but until the day I die, my life will be made up of one situation after another (be it good or bad), I constantly sin though my heart’s desire is not to, and God has promised that no matter what I face, that He is always with me. So, it seems that I’ll always be overwhelmed with one of the three (let me know of other areas you may be aware of… these seem to be the big 3 for me)
this is why I’m so grateful that the Psalms are in the Bible. The Psalmists asked “why” a lot too…
Why, O LORD, do you stand far away? Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble? Psalm 10:1
Awake! Why are you sleeping, O Lord? Rouse yourself! Do not reject us forever! Why do you hide your face? Why do you forget our affliction and oppression? Psalm 44:23 – 24
O LORD, why do you cast my soul away? Why do you hide your face from me? Psalm 88:14
O God, why do you cast us off forever? Why does your anger smoke against the sheep of your pasture? Psalm 74:1
Reading those questions gives me much comfort in knowing that God does not condemn my weakness. He does not become angry when I impatiently ask why… yet again. He does not strike me dead for thinking that He has left me, forsaken me, or judged me because of my sin. He has included these passages in the Bible to give me hope. I am not alone in asking why. This is not the first time He has heard these questions.
but that doesn’t mean i can stay there… I need to ask another why…
Why should I fear in times of trouble? Psalm 49:5
Why are you cast down, O my soul,and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,my salvation. Psalm 42:5
Why should I cower in fear being more aware of my sin than of God’s amazing grace? He died to give me hope. He sent His Son to prove His love for me… even while I was (because until the day I die i always will be) a sinner.
I know that I shall look upon the goodness of the Lord… I know that my Redeemer lives. I know that my God’s promises are true… He will never forsake me. He may never answer my questions of why. But He will never leave me in a position where I can truly ask “God, why have you forsaken me?”
He already answered that question… on the cross… where Jesus WAS forsaken. Where He was alone. Where He suffered in deep agony and pain. And where my Jesus cried “it is finished.” I want my questions of “why” to rest here…
When I thought, “My foot slips,”your steadfast love, O LORD, held me up. Psalm 94:18
Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits. Who forgives all your iniquity, who heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit, who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy, who satisfies you with good so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s.
The LORD works righteousness and justice for all who are oppressed. He made known his ways to Moses, his acts to the people of Israel. The LORD is merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love. He will not always chide, nor will he keep his anger forever. He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities.
For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us. As a father shows compassion to his children, so the LORD shows compassion to those who fear him. For he knows our frame; he remembers that we are dust. Psalm 103:6-14